Will Says…Mom, Apple Pie & Chevrolet!

I have been racking my brain lately, trying to figure out what America makes anymore. You know, we used to make a good hamburger. Now don’t get me wrong, some of us backyard cookers still make a mean burger, but are we known outside our country for the hamburger? No, not unless you think that pounded down, farthest thing from meat patty, they serve at McDonald’s is a good representation of America’s finest greasy spoon icon.

Even the apple pie in “Mom, Apple pie & Chevrolet has been reduced to a small square (a turnover- which sounds like an American concept, turn & burn) they process, then freeze and pop into a microwave and serve up in a second’s notice. And, chances are the apple filling didn’t fall from our trees here in the States. Plus, the car mentioned in that slogan, “Chevrolet”; well, you tell me you would rather have a modern day Chevy car over a ’55 Chevy and I will bet you a happy meal you might just be one of the folks keeping the 99 cent stores in business.

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It just bothers me a little that I can’t think of what America makes that folks all around the world know to be MADE in The USA. China = toys, Japan = electronics, Germany = watches… But America, …? Then it hit me! What we make =WAR, we make WARS; don’t get me wrong, someone has to make ‘um and make them, we do.

Thing is, we have been making them for, well, forever. This country was built on a war. We are so good at making this product that we have gotten in the business of exporting war.

If you are having a war, we want to be part of it. Now, it’s not a cheap product to make; no, it is downright expensive. Mainly because folks aren’t always buying, but we are always selling it. Of course, Americans, being the entrepreneurs we are; they figured a way to sell items that can ignite a small problem into a national incident and then on to a war.

Weapons, troops, … tear gas, funding! No war is too small. Funny thing about American values; if you country has anything less, them is just fighting words.

So, the next time you are planning war, give us a call. And remember to look for the “Made in the USA” label on your products, ’cause we can’t find it here in the US.

Your Friend,

Will

“The Good Will Tour”

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Will Roberts
Will Roberts is a Guinness World Record holder for Cowboy six gun, a weapons expert and professional actor. He is a trick roper and cowboy humorist, who pays tribute to Will Rogers, America's cowboy, with a wit as quick as his rope. Will is a syndicated political cartoonist and was the trick-roping cowboy at Cirque du Soleil.Will has covered the Republican National Convention, Democrat events and Presidential debates. At home in front of or behind the camera, in front of or behind a radio microphone, Will reports what he sees, usually with a twist of humor.