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Cook Our Bacon Naked, But Not So Drunk!

By Rocco "Boss Hog" Loosbrock

Halloween has always been one of those wild and crazy nights where things that can possibly go wrong usually do.

I'm not talking monsters, demons, vampires or all the crazy people out there who behave as if they are monsters, demons, vampires and crazy people. I'm not talking about the mysteriously magical, mythical, mystical mayhem of merry makers or the emanations of effervescent evil energy bubbling up out of the very bowels of hell.

I'm not talking about the pushy pranks for pubescent punishment for providing a paltry pay-off or the wrong response to the lilting tune of small gangs of children daring you to your face with a call for a "trick or treat!"

Nope, I'm not even talking about the well intended, random ritualized, make-shift mischief that one can inadvertently participate in than can so quickly turn disastrously dangerous at the "drop of your pants!"

No, I'm talking about this guy! This story is about what happens when you do the math! The problem: Guy + Bacon + Booze + Halloween Night =. Burning Down The House With Bacon or what I like to call the "Hallowed Halls Of Halloween Hell-Fire!

Introducing what clearly is the all-time craziest bacon text message ever sent by a "bacon frying drunk," texting a friend on Halloween night for the year 2008:

Signing off at Pigging out!
Rocco "Boss Hog" Loosbrock

Rocco owns and runs a Bacon of the Month Club called The Bacon Freak Bacon is Meat Candy Club as well as a Wine Club called the Coastal Vineyard Wine Club