Will Says…Mom, Apple Pie & Chevrolet!


I have been racking my brain lately, trying to figure out what America makes anymore. You know, we used to make a good hamburger. Now don’t get me wrong, some of us backyard cookers still make a mean burger, but are we known outside our country for the hamburger? No, not unless you think that pounded down, farthest thing from meat patty, they serve at McDonald’s is a good representation of America’s finest greasy spoon icon.

Even the apple pie in “Mom, Apple pie & Chevrolet has been reduced to a small square (a turnover- which sounds like an American concept, turn & burn) they process, then freeze and pop into a microwave and serve up in a second’s notice. And, chances are the apple filling didn’t fall from our trees here in the States. Plus, the car mentioned in that slogan, “Chevrolet”; well, you tell me you would rather have a modern day Chevy car over a ’55 Chevy and I will bet you a happy meal you might just be one of the folks keeping the 99 cent stores in business.


It just bothers me a little that I can’t think of what America makes that folks all around the world know to be MADE in The USA. China = toys, Japan = electronics, Germany = watches… But America, …? Then it hit me! What we make =WAR, we make WARS; don’t get me wrong, someone has to make ‘um and make them, we do.

Thing is, we have been making them for, well, forever. This country was built on a war. We are so good at making this product that we have gotten in the business of exporting war.

If you are having a war, we want to be part of it. Now, it’s not a cheap product to make; no, it is downright expensive. Mainly because folks aren’t always buying, but we are always selling it. Of course, Americans, being the entrepreneurs we are; they figured a way to sell items that can ignite a small problem into a national incident and then on to a war.

Weapons, troops, … tear gas, funding! No war is too small. Funny thing about American values; if you country has anything less, them is just fighting words.

So, the next time you are planning war, give us a call. And remember to look for the “Made in the USA” label on your products, ’cause we can’t find it here in the US.

Your Friend,


“The Good Will Tour”

1-866-381-Will (9455)

Direct# 310-228-7105

Fax# 800-844-4259

“All I Know Is What Little I Read On The Internet!”

Will Roberts is a trick roper and cowboy humorist, who pays tribute to Will Rogers, America’s cowboy, with a wit as quick as his rope. Will is a syndicated political cartoonist and was recently the trick-roping cowboy at Cirque du Soleil.

Will has covered the Republican National Convention, Democrat events and the McCain-Obama debates. At home in front of or behind the camera, in front of or behind a radio microphone, Will reports what he sees, usually with a twist of humor.