Britain Releases Plan For Dealing With Zombie Apocalypse

By Robert Paul Reyes  

"Britain's Ministry of Defense responded to a Freedom of Information request by saying stopping an attack from the undead would be left to the Cabinet Office.

'In the event of an apocalyptic incident (e.g. zombies), any plans to rebuild and return England to its pre-attack glory would be led by the Cabinet Office, and thus any pre-planning activity would also taken place there,' the defense ministry said."

In the event of a Zombie Apocalypse the American government would probably declare zombies an endangered species, and pass laws making it illegal to kill them, even though they are already dead.

When the zombies invade the federal government would probably do an environmental impact study on the effect of zombie corpses on the environment before allowing civilians to kill the monsters.

I don't need no stinkin' license or permit from the feds to kill me some zombies. I am ready for the Zombie Apocalypse; I have plenty of ammunition for my guns and a Jeep Cherokee ideal for running over the lumbering undead.

Exterminating the slow-moving zombies is as easy as fishing from a barrel, leave it to the government to deprive law-abiding citizens from every conceivable pleasure.

When the Zombie Apocalypse finally arrives, I will shoot them from my Jeep while I'm smoking weed and drinking alcohol.

I ain't about to let the feds stop me from the pursuit of happiness!

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Robert Paul Reyes is a NewsBlaze writer on Politics, Pop Culture and Pointless Pontificating. Contact him by writing to NewsBlaze. Read more stories by Robert Paul Reyes.