Top Ten Worst Things About Christmas
I don't need any more paper weights.
Usually things that are frothy are fun and taste good. But I'd rather get drunk drinking moonshine.
My family and friends know I'm a jeans and T-shirt kind of guy; the only time I wear a suit is when someone dies or gets married. So why do I get a bunch of freakin' ties every damn Christmas?
These parasitic plants may attract bugs, but they haven't motivated any ho's to kiss me. HO, HO, HO! Yeah, Right.
If I see another wino making a few bucks during the Holidays by donning a red suit, I will set him on fire.
Why the hell do they keep playing Christmas songs from the 50's on the radio?
This is a silly tradition, you can't fit a computer in a stocking, and damn an adult movie DVD won't even fit.
FOX NEWS ANNUAL WAR ON CHRISTMAS TOMFOOLERY
I know that the Fox News female anchors are super-hot, but enough with the "war on Xmas" nonsense.
Beggars should hide inside dumpsters during the Christmas season. How can we be "Happy and Jolly" and all that crap when they keep begging us for money?
CHRISTMAS TOP TEN LISTS
Come on dudes, this is too easy a way to write a Christmas article.
Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes
Robert Paul Reyes is a NewsBlaze writer on Politics, Pop Culture and Pointless Pontificating. Contact him by writing to NewsBlaze. Read more stories by Robert Paul Reyes.
* The views of Opinion writers do not necessarily reflect the views of NewsBlaze
Related Opinions News