Woman Gets Probabtion For Beating Boyfriend With Bat

By Robert Paul Reyes  

"Mirivic Simpliciano, 30, was placed on probation in a Maui courtroom this week after pleading no-contest to beating her boyfriend in April, and told the court she thought she now had a handle on things.

'After the incident, I took the initiative to get some help,' Simpliciano said.

The incident began when Simpliciano's boyfriend came in a little late at 7:30 p.m. She started out flailing at him with a foam-rubber bat and a toy light-saber. But she moved up from kid toys to the real deal and let him have it with a metal bat, the newspaper said." - UPI

Simpliciano is certifiably bonkers or at the very least bat sh** crazy. It is a gentleman's prerogative to arrive home a little bit late; for God's sake he got home at 7:30 pm, not at 7:30 in the morning.

If a man comes home before the rooster crows, his lady should spread petals of roses from the front door to the bedroom.

This woman's boyfriend should kick her to the curb, if she's this possessive now and they're not even married, once they tie the knot she will probably be waiting for him with a sawed-off shotgun if he dares to be late again.

There are no shades of gray with this lunatic, when she saw that the foam-rubber bat wasn't having the intended consequences, she quickly switched over to an aluminum bat. This type of female will kiss you passionately one moment, and deliver a good solid kick to your rear end a moment later.

Simpliciano took it upon herself to enroll in an anger-management class, but the judge should have given her a stiffer penalty than probation.

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Robert Paul Reyes is a NewsBlaze writer on Politics, Pop Culture and Pointless Pontificating. Contact him by writing to NewsBlaze. Read more stories by Robert Paul Reyes.