Published: July 29, 2010
Op-Ed Contributor
Cruel & Unusual Punishment: Lindsay Lohan Forced to Wear Granny Panties in Jail
By Robert Paul Reyes
"Can't tell which fashion violation Lindsay Lohan finds more humiliating: The orange jail jumpsuit she's wearing or the one-size-fits-all "granny panties" that a source says she has to knot at the sides to keep from falling down.
In Touch weekly has even more details on Lindsay's current stint inside the Lynwood jail in Los Angeles, where she's cooling her jets until at least next week for violating her probation on a drunk driving charge.
'She's been crying all day long and is a total mess,' the mag's source says. 'She's now in a catatonic, out-of-it calm.'" Read More
Lindsay Lohan fashions herself a designer, she even has her own clothing line. For the drug-addled fashionista, it must be torture being forced to wear an orange jail jumpsuit.
To add insult to injury LiLo has to wear prison issue one-size-fits-all granny panties. If an upskirt pic of Lindsay wearing granny panties ever hit the Internet it would mean the end of her career.
Lindsay is cutting-edge, she usually eschews panties, but if she deigns to don panties, they resemble dental floss. I'm sorry, but forcing the demented starlet to wear granny panties qualifies as cruel and unusual punishment.
The first thing LiLo will do when she steps out of jail will be to take off her granny panties, and flash the paparazzi as a symbol of freedom and redemption.
Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes
Robert Paul Reyes is a NewsBlaze writer on Politics, Pop Culture and Pointless Pontificating. Contact him by writing to NewsBlaze.
* The views of Opinion writers do not necessarily reflect the views of NewsBlaze
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